Martin Kelner Martin KELNER.com
Martin Kelner, Journalist, Author and Radio Presenter.
Stats since 28 Aug 2006:


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NEW - The Kelner Mart

Martins Money Saving Offers at the Kelner Mart...
NEW - The Kelner Mart
Posted by Martin 'Money Saver' Kelner and Edouard 'Tightwad' Lapaglie on Jul 9, 2008 - 12:42:16 PM
ONLY AVAILABLE AT MARTINKELNER.COM

OFFER 1 - 4GB MEMORY SCHTICK
Product: 4Gb pen drive with OVER 110 podcasts loaded - just £24.99 inc post, packing and VAT!
Product Code: PPP4GB
£24.99 inc P&P


OFFER 2 PISS POOR DVD
Product: DVD disk with OVER 110 podcasts pre recorded - just £9.99 inc post, packing and VAT!
Product Code: PPPDVD
£9.99 inc P&P


SUBSCRIPTIONS - SUBSCRIPTIONS - SUBSCRIPTIONS

OFFER 3 - PISS POOR PODCAST SUBSCRIPTION - pay via PayPal

£5.00 per 5 weeks


OFFER 3 - PISS POOR PODCAST SUBSCRIPTION - pay via Google Checkout

£5.00 per 5 weeks
more - >



Your chance to honour a radio legend!
NEW - The Kelner Mart
Posted by Martin "Kiss Me Hardy" Kelner and Edouard "Closet Hopper" LaPaglie on Jun 18, 2008 - 3:10:44 PM
Yes, fans!

Pay tribute to the genius of Steve Penk. Absolutely free!

Direct from Leeds market, we are proud to offer you free of charge your very own copy of Steve Penk's Greatest Hits - The Best of Steve Penk Wind-Ups as heard on Century FM!

This beautifully crafted audio delight features such side-splitting lines as:

"Hello, I'm not Steve Penk.."

"Hello missus, your husband's just fallen into a vat of molten lead at the smelting works. No, I'm only joking, it's Steve Penk."

"Hello, I just got killed in a car crash. No I didn't, it's Steve Penk."

"Hello, I'm from the council and we're going to knock your house down. No we're not, ho, ho, it's Steve Penk."

It's a $20 dollar value at least, and it's yours absolutely free!

Yes, free!

4Gb USB Memory Stick





Product: 4Gb pen drive with OVER 110 podcasts loaded - just £24.99 inc post, packing and VAT!

Product Code: PPP4GB

Quantity:




And all you have to do is buy the exclusive Martin Kelner and Edouard LaPaglie Memorial memory stick. It's a fantastic 4 GIGABYTE USB Pen Drive, packed with AT LEAST 110 Piss Poor Podcasts for under £25 fully inclusive - you could pay MORE than this for just the memory stick!

Over £100 value for less than £25 - and a free Steve Penk CD to boot!!

WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR......
Buy now while limited stocks last! (limited to the amount of people who want one)...The next TEN memory sticks despatched will come with a FREE Steve Penk wind-up CD. We might even be able to extend it, depending on the guy in Leeds market who has boxes of the buggers...

Here are just some of the comments from satisfied customers who have already bought the MK and ELP Memory Stick:

"Brilliant. I bought one, ate it, and brought it straight back up again." John Prescott

"Fantastic. Crisper than hand-reared bacon from a contented Norfolkshire pig, my life!" - Jay Rayner

"So funny I damn near laughed my cock off!" - Sandi Toksvig

"I'm dead now, but if I was alive, I'd buy three of the bastards." - Bernard Manning

"On the day that you were born, the angels got together and decided to create a dream come true." - Richard Carpenter

BUY ONE NOW OR THE HAMSTER GETS IT! more - >



iPods, MP3 players and more....
NEW - The Kelner Mart
Posted by Edouard "Barrow Boy" Lapaglie on Jun 18, 2008 - 2:28:16 PM
Everything you would ever need to get the best from the P P Podcast.... more - >



Shop at the Kelner Mart - 2Gb pen drive packed with 72 piss poor podcasts
NEW - The Kelner Mart
Posted by Martin "Hello, I'm not Steve Penk" Kelner on May 5, 2008 - 3:47:44 PM
Memory stick deal updated:

BUY A USB MEMORY STICK, JAM PACKED WITH PISS POOR PODCASTS - CLICK HERE, plus get a STEVE PENK Phone Pranks CD FREE (while stocks last) more - >



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Latest Additions..

 Piss Poor Podcast
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 Piss Poor Postcard From Edinburgh – The Nightmare Continues…..
 Martins Newsletter
 Sign up for the Martin Kelner Newsletter
 Martin Kelner - The Man
 Martin Kelner - One Man and His Trousers
 Contact Martin by email....
 NEW - The Kelner Mart
 Martins Money Saving Offers at the Kelner Mart...
 Your chance to honour a radio legend!
 Martins Money Saving Tips
 More Savings with Martins Money Saving Tips - Annual Podcast Subscription
 Save £££s - Kelner Comes To The Rescue in These Difficult Times!
 Stalkers Guide
 New Series on Talksport!
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 Screen Break
 A smacked bottom and a plate of Bourbon biscuits - just the job for Max Mosley
 Bruno - Not bonkers, but unhinged enough to do panto in Saffron Walden!
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 The genius of Peter Cook
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 When Will I Be Famous?
 When Will I Be Famous - Order Now!!
 WWIBF unpugged
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 Something for the weekend
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 Martin's Links
 Martin Kelner's website links
 Travel
 Kelner learns how to be funny on stand-up comedy course!
 Martin in Minnesota - in the footsteps of Bob Dylan
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