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Martin Kelner
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Screen Break
Why I am not now in Hollywood by a swimming pool taking drugs
Screen Break
Posted by Martin "Mr TV" Kelner on May 24, 2011 - 3:55:08 PM
The story of how I nearly co-produced a television programme for Gary Wilmot.. From a Guardian Screen Break column of around two years ago....
more - >
Woof woof - Clare goes to Crufts
Screen Break
Posted by Martin "Not allowed on the couch" Kelner on Feb 16, 2011 - 5:26:53 PM
Here's a piece from the Screen Break back catalogue from less than a year ago, retrieved in response to Guardian Sport supremo Ian Prior's tweet saying this piece in the New York Times is the most inappropriate feature ever to appear in a sports section.
Afraid not, Ian. Your very own newspaper beat the mighty New York Times to it with this back-page piece from March 2010
more - >
I can't believe he gets paid for writing this sh*t
Screen Break
Posted by Martin "snuffling round the bottom of the barrel" Kelner on Feb 22, 2010 - 2:05:56 PM
This is something I wrote in the Screen Break column in the winter of 2008/2009, when it appears I could get away with any old bollocks. Obviously, it's all changed now, and Screen Break on a Monday is an informed and carefully reasoned commentary on the ever-changing world of broadcast sport...
Be warned, by the way, I am scouring old SBs to see if there is anything I can use in a book I am writing about the history of sport on TV.
How sad; plagiarising your bloody self...Now read on. more - >
A smacked bottom and a plate of Bourbon biscuits - just the job for Max Mosley
Screen Break
Posted by Martin "Pass the fig rolls and the gimp mask" Kelner on Jul 17, 2008 - 7:16:55 PM
After an evening of Teutonic-flavoured sado-masochism, the boss of Formula One and his lady friends liked nothing better than to settle down with a cup of Earl Grey and a nice selection of biscuits... more - >
Bruno - Not bonkers, but unhinged enough to do panto in Saffron Walden!
Screen Break
Posted by Martin "horizontal heavyweight" Kelner on Jun 3, 2008 - 10:25:56 PM
Here's a thing I did for The Guardian about a Frank Bruno documentary on the telly. Not madly topical, but you don't hear much about Bruno these days, and there are one or two lines that might evince a muffled titter in these hard times.
Tuck in! more - >
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