Martin Kelner Martin
Martin Kelner, Journalist, Author and Radio Presenter.
Stats since 28 08 06:

    Search for in  

Bits and Pieces

Jeremy Corbyn's Desert Island Discs
By Martin "pop pickin'" Kelner on Oct 10, 2015 - 8:31:11 AM

At some point during his short time as Labour leader - he's already outlasted Tim Sherwood so take that, media - Jeremy Corbyn is likely to be invited onto Desert Island Discs. 

I suspect he may have been too busy to give much thought to his tunes, but his research department has been hard at it (anybody believe politicians ever go on Desert Island Discs without being thoroughly spun?)

Here, then, the provisional list of Jeremy Corbyn's Desert Island Discs. 

1.   The Staple Singers - I'll Take You There 

Confident start.   It's a gospel/r'n'b outfit, but one of their secular songs, so that covers religion-lite , and they're a family, taking care of diversity, inclusivity, and family values in just the one selection.

Also it's got a beat, suggesting your man, on a hot date discussing dialectical imperatives with Diane Abbott, might have taken his lady for a little soul shuffle round the dance floor

2.   Kirsty MacColl - A New England

In the same way as book reviewers are not above giving their friends' work a push, it's quite likely Jeremy would want to reward Billy Bragg for his continued adherence to Old Labour.   But, hang on Jeremy, why not Kirsty MacColl's version of a Bragg song.

Billy gets the PRS, and you appeal not only to Old Labour but to Very Very Old Labour who think fondly of Kirsty's dad Ewan, folk singer, activist, and on the side of the angels in the Spanish Civil War.   Plus she can sing.

3.  Woody Guthrie - Ludlow Massacre

Bit of politics.   It's about the death of mine workers in Colorado in 1914, and while there's no evidence the hated Blairites were directly responsible, I think the message is clear……Rachel Reeves & Liz Kendall

4. Natural Woman - Carol King

Wow, talk about killing two birds with one stone.    Carol King is a powerful, independent woman, the type Jeremy values - although maybe not enough to give them a top job in the shadow cabinet. 

And, as a bonus, she's Jewish - which can only help the renunciation of past comments about 'friends in Hamas & Hezbollah,' who, to be fair, could get a bit antsy with the Jews.

5.   Ian Dury & The Blockheads - Clever Trevor

Ah, humour.   No politician appears on Desert Island Discs without choosing one to show he or she has a sense of humour.   Where the Tories and the hated Blairites might opt for Ernie The Fastest Milkman In The West or Always Look on the Bright Side of Life, Jeremy can perform a clever sidestep here - something Dury himself couldn't do (what, too soon?) - and opt for the witty, impeccably working class and undeniably disabled troubadour.

And how about pretending one of your sons used to love it when he was little.  Family man.   Result.

6.   Bit of classical

Hmmm, for a patron of the Islington Music Forum we should pick a classical tune. Preferably nothing by a fascist, egomaniacal, syphilitic nymphomaniac, says Jeremy, so that's most of the Germans out. 

How about some Chopin?   As far as we can tell he was neither a child molester nor a wife beater.   He lived in France with George Sand ("Ah good, that'll play well with the gay lobby.   What, George was a woman?   Damn") And Chopin was Polish.   Lot of votes there.

7.   Soundtrack to the Struggle - Lowkey feat Mavado

God, we had to listen to a lot of Urban Grime to find something that wasn't just some chap bombastically waving his cock about, and shouting about his hos, and suchlike.   But Mr Lowkey, according to Wikipedia, is a 'rapper, musician and political activist of English and Iraqi descent.'   Glory be - and they'll fade it out before the end so you don't have to listen to all of it.

8. Leader of the Pack - Shangri-Las

… a reminder of a motorcycling holiday in East Germany…Ha, ha, only joking.

8.   Coal Not Dole - The Watersons

At last, something from the North to show Jeremy is more than just Islington man.   Their stuff's a bit Hey Nonny No, but they've been on god knows how many protests, and they love them in Hoyland Common.

Will that do? 

Now for the books; er, try and stay clear of the Ragged Trousered thingy & Grapes Of Wrath, pick something left (or right) of field, give him a bit of hinterland. 


---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ---------- ----------
Latest Additions..

 P P Podcast
 Fine dining for the last time on the PPP!
 Wossy ate my podcast - an explanation
 Screen Break
 The Bus Pass Bodybuilders & Motty's Giant Sentence
 Wordy Rappinghood
 Bits and Pieces
 Jeremy Corbyn's Desert Island Discs
 Just a bit of fun! No really, just a bit of fun!
 Martin Writes..
 A little bit about me & Kingswood, Bristol
 Managers - What Are They Like? Why Antonio Conte is not Ange Postecoglou
 Kelners Blog
 My Celebrity Death Match
 A message to Philip Balmforth
 Kelner learns how to be funny on stand-up comedy course!
 Martin in Minnesota - in the footsteps of Bob Dylan
 Martin Kelner - The Man
 The Verve - arentcha sick to death of it?
 Martin Kelner - One Man and His Trousers
 NEW - The Kelner Mart
 Martins Money Saving Offers at the Kelner Mart...
 Stalkers Guide
 Keeping the meters wobbling......
 Sweary Christmas to all our readers
 Martins Money Saving Tips
 Why not save a massive 50-bob on Leeds's big value comedy-style night downstairs at the Verve wine bar, Merrion Street, Leeds, next to Mojo??
 Martins Money Saving Offers - deals at
 Accidental Heroes
 PG Wodehouse
 Bette Davis
 All our Yesterdays
 The Enduring Delight of the Radio Show That Keeps On Giving
 My half-arsed attempt at in-play betting
 When Will I Be Famous?
 Something about Leicester that failed to make the finished book
 When Will I Be Famous - Order Now!!
 Martin's Photo Album
 Fed up with stained wash basins? The solution.
 Something for the weekend
 Martin's Links
 Smashing time
 Martin Kelner's website links
Stats since 280806 - Martin Kelner: