Martin Kelner Martin KELNER.com
Martin Kelner, Journalist, Author and Radio Presenter.
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P P Podcast

You need hands - PPP 222 comes up with a hundred uses for twenty tiny fingers - if you know what I'm saying
P P Podcast
Posted by Martin "cloth ears" Kelner and Edouard "can you hear an echo in hear, echo in hear" LaPaglie on Jul 28, 2010 - 4:06:34 PM
From appearing in adverts for Burger King to unconventional dentistry in Windsor, Ontario, your hands can be the key to your future (I know mine are, says Edouard).  Let PPP 222 show you how...

Also join us as we travel to the city of dreaming spires, where Lynn Barber has left a trail of broken hearts and knackered bedsprings.  Join us in the Ashmolean Dining Room for tales of being rammed in the punt...

...and enjoy it all in the lowest fidelity you will ever hear...
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Percy Pig, Ivan The Donkey, and a drizzle of hot fudge - something for everyone on PPP 221
P P Podcast
Posted by Martin "almost anorexic" Kelner and Edouard "lettuce leaf and a glass of spring water" LaPaglie on Jul 21, 2010 - 4:54:25 PM
As recommended by the trim, svelte, and incredibly attractive Eamonn Holmes (pick the bones out of that, lawyers), PPP 221 presents a gourmand's delight....

......from Jay Rayner fingering a rissotto to the late Gary Cooper getting his laughing tackle round a can of sauerkraut every morning and Kurt Cobain's penchant ("Hey Edouard, what's the French for penchant?") for macaroni cheese.

Meanwhile, thrill to the world's worst Michael Winner impression as we follow the director of one half-decent Death Wish movie and several unspeakable sequels to an all-you-can-eat roadhouse in Florida. 

Pile that plate high.  You know you want to...
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What's going down in the Falklands? - PPP 220 answers the burning question
P P Podcast
Posted by Martin "wet suit" Kelner and Edouard "Cousteau" LaPaglie on Jul 16, 2010 - 5:39:10 PM
Martin and Edouard probe the secrets of the deep  (Altogether now: I know I do)...as they venture into Hans and Lottie Haas territory (kids: ask your nan) to discover the mating habits of cephalopods in the South Atlantic. They come back covered in glory.......or something.

So, scuba gear on, and join us, 20,000 leagues under the sea (surely Leeds United can win one of them) for enough squid todger to make 4,000 seafood pasta specials in Jamie's Italian.....

Mama mia etc. etc.
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Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition - PPP 219 is born again!
P P Podcast
Posted by Martin "Reverend Lovejoy" Kelner and Edouard "Don't mess with my Archbishop Desmond TuTu" LaPaglie on Jul 8, 2010 - 5:00:59 PM
You can't keep a good man down ("I can," says Edouard), so like Frank Sinatra's farewell tour, the PPP just keeps on rolling (although Frank has obviously stopped rolling now)...

In PPP 219, Britain's most indefatigable semi-humorous podcasters find religion, and predict eternal damnation to those of you getting the all-you-can-eat jumbo shrimp special in Long John Silver's...

Verily, we warn you: lay off the chazzerai!  Now read on, mes enfants....
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The PPP Farewell Tour Rolls On! It's PPP 218....
P P Podcast
Posted by Martin "not gone yet" Kelner and Edouard "hanging on by his fingernails" LaPaglie on Jul 1, 2010 - 5:32:09 PM
....And it's still not all over (although I am)!

Suck it in, ladies and Germans, as Britain's most indefatigable podcasters lay down 80 minutes - plus a bonus 15 seconds - of random catchphrases, venerable old jokes, lurid sex scandals from the third world (like Belgium and Liverpool), and prime beefsteak ludicrously dressed in lovage and horseradish butter (like Boy George....

Get it while it's still available (the PPP, not the steak).  You're a fool to yourself if you don't!
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Latest Additions..

 P P Podcast
 Are You Eligible For A Refund of PPI? If so, why not splash it out on PPP?
 The day we said to TV Personality and celebrity trougher Jay Rayner, "Whoah there Jay, get over yourself"
 Screen Break
 The rise and rise of football - the history of it.
 The Pitch-Side Pantomime
 Bits and Pieces
 Want To Be A Radio Star?
 Jeremy Corbyn's Desert Island Discs
 Martin Writes..
 The Story of the Piss Poor Podcast
 Hurrah, I'm an entrepreneur
 Kelners Blog
 My Sacking, and a Plausible Plan for BBC Local Radio
 My Celebrity Death Match
 Travel
 Kelner learns how to be funny on stand-up comedy course!
 Martin in Minnesota - in the footsteps of Bob Dylan
 Martin Kelner - The Man
 The Verve - arentcha sick to death of it?
 Martin Kelner - One Man and His Trousers
 NEW - The Kelner Mart
 Martins Money Saving Offers at the Kelner Mart...
 Stalkers Guide
 Keeping the meters wobbling......
 Sweary Christmas to all our readers
 Martins Money Saving Tips
 Why not save a massive 50-bob on Leeds's big value comedy-style night downstairs at the Verve wine bar, Merrion Street, Leeds, next to Mojo??
 Martins Money Saving Offers - deals at Amazon.co.uk
 Accidental Heroes
 PG Wodehouse
 Bette Davis
 All our Yesterdays
 The Enduring Delight of the Radio Show That Keeps On Giving
 My half-arsed attempt at in-play betting
 When Will I Be Famous?
 Something about Leicester that failed to make the finished book
 When Will I Be Famous - Order Now!!
 Martin's Photo Album
 Fed up with stained wash basins? The solution.
 Something for the weekend
 Martin's Links
 Smashing time
 Martin Kelner's website links