Martin Kelner Martin KELNER.com
Martin Kelner, Journalist, Author, Podcaster and Radio Presenter.
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Managers - What Are They Like? Why Antonio Conte is not Ange Postecoglou
Martin Writes..
Posted by Martin "Old Tat" Kelner on Dec 31, 2021 - 11:59:57 PM

Here's a bit I wrote proving Antonio Conte was an angry young man even before he joined Spurs, and why the comparative serenity of Ange Postecoglou may turn out to be blessed relief.

If you enjoy this kind of historic document, there is tons more in my book Wrestling In Honey, now available in very few good bookshops....
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The Bus Pass Bodybuilders & Motty's Giant Sentence
Screen Break
Posted by Martin "Old Tat" Kelner on Dec 31, 2021 - 11:58:29 PM

Another sample of my hit book, Wrestling In Honey, a collection of some of the old tat I wrote, chiefly for The Guardian and the Racing Post.

To prove this is a genuine historical document, almost everybody mentioned in it is now dead.  RIP omnes.
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LaVern Baker, the Queen of Rock 'n' Roll in Liverpool, 1992
Martin Writes..
Posted by Martin Kelner on Dec 31, 2021 - 11:40:52 PM

I've got a book of old tat coming out.  This didn't make the cut, but it's fascinating rock archaeology, with a mention of the legendary Manchester impressario Roger Eagle,and Liverpool's faded Adelphi Hotel....
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Jimmy Hill - A Life in TV
Martin Writes..

Lest we forget, the contribution of the late great Jimmy Hill to broadcasting lives on, even today....
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Chess and the Comfort Break
Martin Writes..
Posted by Martin "Old Tat" Kelner on Dec 31, 2021 - 12:59:12 PM

Here's a piece I wrote for the Guardian's Screen Break column about sport on TV in October 2006, covering chess, tennis (briefly), and rugby league.  This, and similar old tat, is reprinted in my book Wrestling In Honey, available in very few good bookshops.  But it's on the Amazon and Waterstones websites, and boutique bookshop Philip Howard Books in Leeds have signed copies....
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Why Wrestling In Honey?
Martin Writes..
Posted by Martin "Old Tat" Kelner on Apr 23, 2021 - 4:57:51 PM

(Here I am in the outer suburbs of the Sky remote, attempting to provide fun for the aging Guardian audience in the only way I know how.   All you need to know is the nation at the time was dealing with the scandal of comedian Russell Brand's unpleasant prank telephone calls to the much loved Fawlty Towers legend Andrew Sachs.)

Honey, Fighting and the Disturbing Topic of My Libido, The Guardian November 3, 2008

 

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The Glory of Eurovision
Martin Writes..
Posted by Martin Kelner on Mar 10, 2021 - 3:24:48 PM

With Eurovision on the way, here's a piece I wrote for the Racing Post about ten years ago, to help deluded punters who fancied a bet on the contest.  Most of the points I make actually still apply.  I'm a patriotic punter and have backed the UK's Mae Muller to win at 28-1.  A collection of some of my old tat will be released in book form this Spring (2023), but this piece failed to make the cut....
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Back in 2009, we were hoping Andy Murray would solve the economic crisis
Screen Break
Posted by Martin Kelner on Sep 23, 2020 - 7:01:04 PM

Andy Murray fails to reach Wimbledon final, sending the British economy into a tailspin, Guardian Screen Break, July 6, 2009

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Latest Additions..

 P P Podcast
 Fine dining for the last time on the PPP!
 Wossy ate my podcast - an explanation
 Screen Break
 The Bus Pass Bodybuilders & Motty's Giant Sentence
 Back in 2009, we were hoping Andy Murray would solve the economic crisis
 Bits and Pieces
 Jeremy Corbyn's Desert Island Discs
 Just a bit of fun! No really, just a bit of fun!
 Martin Writes..
 Managers - What Are They Like? Why Antonio Conte is not Ange Postecoglou
 LaVern Baker, the Queen of Rock 'n' Roll in Liverpool, 1992
 Kelners Blog
 My Celebrity Death Match
 A message to Philip Balmforth
 Travel
 Kelner learns how to be funny on stand-up comedy course!
 Martin in Minnesota - in the footsteps of Bob Dylan
 Martin Kelner - The Man
 The Verve - arentcha sick to death of it?
 Martin Kelner - One Man and His Trousers
 NEW - The Kelner Mart
 Martins Money Saving Offers at the Kelner Mart...
 Stalkers Guide
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 Sweary Christmas to all our readers
 Martins Money Saving Tips
 Why not save a massive 50-bob on Leeds's big value comedy-style night downstairs at the Verve wine bar, Merrion Street, Leeds, next to Mojo??
 Martins Money Saving Offers - deals at Amazon.co.uk
 Accidental Heroes
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 Bette Davis
 All our Yesterdays
 The Enduring Delight of the Radio Show That Keeps On Giving
 My half-arsed attempt at in-play betting
 When Will I Be Famous?
 Something about Leicester that failed to make the finished book
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 Fed up with stained wash basins? The solution.
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